Meagan and Rachel
INT. MOVIE THEATER BATHROOM
(It is the premiere of Twilight’s New Moon and two young girls, age 13, enter arms interlocked.)
Meagan: Wouldn’t it be so crazy but also SO AWESOME if the cast of Twilight like, came to this showing?!
Rachel: You are so retarded that’s so not going to happen.
Meagan: GOD I am. I’m like those kids at school who just sit in that one classroom and eat Pringles all day.
Rachel: Haha, it really is like you have special needs. But oh my god what if they did come!?
Meagan: I know!!!!
(The girls continue staring at themselves in the mirror, fussing with the parts in their hair in a quick but indecisive fashion.)
Meagan: UGH, and if Bella were here I would just totally punch her in the face.
Rachel: I would stab her!!
Meagan: And then we could like, …
Meagan and Rachel: MAKE OUT WITH EDWARDDDDDD!!
(The girls laugh at how in sync they are with each other, start jumping up and down and scream at a fever pitch for a straight minute in between breaths. Rachel punches the mirror—it shatters into 4 distinct blocks and blood starts to run from her hand.)
Meagan: Okay I’m feeling out of breath at this point.
Rachel: Me too and I’m a little dizzy.
Meagan: WHAT DID WE EVEN COME IN HERE FOR?
Rachel: WHERE ARE WE?!?
Meagan: What is this—is this a sink? And are those toilets stalls?
Rachel: Meagan, I don’t know let’s just go in them.
Rachel: What do I do with this toilet paper??
Meagan: Where do I put my butt!!
Rachel: I just threw up.
Meagan: Oh my god did you really?
Rachel: Yeah, and I don’t know why, but I threw up on the floor instead of the in toilet.
Meagan: Rachel!
Rachel: I know!
FIN.
(via hicatie)
